Okay, usually, I don't like to delve into too many specifics in my online blog. Due to the fact that this website isn't blocked at all and my blog is, for all intents and purposes, public domain, I contain my more personal vents and rants to my private journal, which I carry with me like a security blanket. But people have been asking me what's been going on lately - why I've been so messy. And while I can't blame my moods of the past couple weeks on one solid incident, I can blame this week on one. [No names will be mentioned in here. I haven't sunk that low.]
On Monday night/Tuesday morning, I found out a lot of things about some person. Number 1, she can't be trusted. I told her "sensitive" information about me in confidence, and she told another friends of ours. I was upset about this situation alone, but it gets worse because the information reached someone else - someone who dislikes me enough without having another reason to say shit about me. It's a hard-hitting topic with me, and it got me where it hurts.
Needless to say, this person and I aren't even speaking. I don't even know what to say to her right now. Every time I see her, I can't even bring myself to look her in the eye, let alone say anything to her. Things are icy cold right now, and I've got the power to stop this. But I don't think I will, not yet. I'm still really upset and angry, so it's not going to happen, at least not yet. I want her to prove that she's sorry before I forgive her.
That's all.
-K
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Um, on Sadness...
So on 1/21 [I think] I wrote a blog about the feeling of sadness and how much I hate it. I'm ready to revisit this topic right now, and actually, I find it very fitting that I have chosen to go through my archives today of all days.
Now, let it be said that I am the type of person who holds very strong in her feelings on things, so for me to change an opinion of mine is extremely rare. However, last night I had an epiphany of sorts and came to several strong realizations.
1. Being a strong person is a good thing. Being weak, or in other terms, having a moment of weakness, does not make you any less of a person. In fact, by allowing yourself to be vulnerable and to tear down your walls for a moment helps you. You become more of a person. In my opinion, anyway.
2. Sadness, like any other emotion, is healthy in moderation. Crying is not a bad thing. Sometimes, a nice mental breakdown is exactly what you need. Being a blubbering, crying mess every now and again is a good thing. Bottling things up is bad.
3. Having someone to rely on can generally make all the difference. As great as all my friends here are, I really seemed to be lacking a support system - someone who I could go to and cry and vent to and just be what I needed to be. Simply put, I was terrified of letting go. But then someone said to me: "You never have to be afraid around me". And I knew it was true. And suddenly, I wasn't afraid anymore.
So, I don't hate being sad anymore. I am accepting it as a normal, inevitable part of life. We will be sad just as we will be happy, angry, envious, or apathetic. So it goes.
XO,
Kerry
Now, let it be said that I am the type of person who holds very strong in her feelings on things, so for me to change an opinion of mine is extremely rare. However, last night I had an epiphany of sorts and came to several strong realizations.
1. Being a strong person is a good thing. Being weak, or in other terms, having a moment of weakness, does not make you any less of a person. In fact, by allowing yourself to be vulnerable and to tear down your walls for a moment helps you. You become more of a person. In my opinion, anyway.
2. Sadness, like any other emotion, is healthy in moderation. Crying is not a bad thing. Sometimes, a nice mental breakdown is exactly what you need. Being a blubbering, crying mess every now and again is a good thing. Bottling things up is bad.
3. Having someone to rely on can generally make all the difference. As great as all my friends here are, I really seemed to be lacking a support system - someone who I could go to and cry and vent to and just be what I needed to be. Simply put, I was terrified of letting go. But then someone said to me: "You never have to be afraid around me". And I knew it was true. And suddenly, I wasn't afraid anymore.
So, I don't hate being sad anymore. I am accepting it as a normal, inevitable part of life. We will be sad just as we will be happy, angry, envious, or apathetic. So it goes.
XO,
Kerry
Monday, February 9, 2009
The Kerry Club
You think you know, but you have no idea!
So, at college, I met my other half, basically. Her name is Kerry. Coincidence? Hell no. But she brings out my kiddie side. Yanno, the side that rocks out to Dancing Queen and considers hardcore Bop It a form of exercise. We really don't go a day without seeing each other, and if we do, it's a big tackle hug the next day and an "OMG I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!!!" And we're dead serious. We may be polar opposites personality wise, but I honestly love this girl to death. I'd kill for her, and she knows it. She keeps me down on Earth, and I keep her on her toes. Movie night, yeah, we have that like 4x a week. And don't get us started on musicals, Evanescence, or Wall-E, because we'll talk/sing your ears off. Yeah, we're kickass singers, but shhhhhh, we don't like to tell people. I've got this Wall-E toy right, and I keep him on my keychain. Well, when I went home this weekend, I gave him to her to babysit, and she knitted him a scarf because he was cold. And I found that perfectly acceptable, while everyone else was so "WTF?!". No, but really, we are cooler, prettier, awesomer, and overall just better than you and your friends. We have excellent adventures. We sing, we dance [well...uh...kind of], we have excellent adventures, and we do it all without messing up our makeup. And if we do, you best believe we're whipping out the mirrors to fix it, because we're always looking good.
OH AND...
The Kerry Club is EXTREMELY exclusive. Don't even try to join, bitches.
Peace out, girl scouts.
-K
So, at college, I met my other half, basically. Her name is Kerry. Coincidence? Hell no. But she brings out my kiddie side. Yanno, the side that rocks out to Dancing Queen and considers hardcore Bop It a form of exercise. We really don't go a day without seeing each other, and if we do, it's a big tackle hug the next day and an "OMG I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!!!" And we're dead serious. We may be polar opposites personality wise, but I honestly love this girl to death. I'd kill for her, and she knows it. She keeps me down on Earth, and I keep her on her toes. Movie night, yeah, we have that like 4x a week. And don't get us started on musicals, Evanescence, or Wall-E, because we'll talk/sing your ears off. Yeah, we're kickass singers, but shhhhhh, we don't like to tell people. I've got this Wall-E toy right, and I keep him on my keychain. Well, when I went home this weekend, I gave him to her to babysit, and she knitted him a scarf because he was cold. And I found that perfectly acceptable, while everyone else was so "WTF?!". No, but really, we are cooler, prettier, awesomer, and overall just better than you and your friends. We have excellent adventures. We sing, we dance [well...uh...kind of], we have excellent adventures, and we do it all without messing up our makeup. And if we do, you best believe we're whipping out the mirrors to fix it, because we're always looking good.
OH AND...
The Kerry Club is EXTREMELY exclusive. Don't even try to join, bitches.
Peace out, girl scouts.
-K
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Hair Dyeing Advice
Since I do enough of this, I figured I should pass on my years of wisdom. I personally love the "skunk" look [one color on top of another, check my Facebook for pics. Any of the pictures from college are this style] and have been messing around with it since September. Since it's my favorite [and the hardest to do, IMO], it's the one I'm going to talk about.
When doing this, I change the color of my whole head. For example, my hair was pink and brown, but I've just changed it to purple and black. For the "natural" colors, I usually use Herbal Essences brand hair dye from drugstores. It lasts long and doesn't damage your hair like other dyes can, plus it doesn't stink. :) For my crazy colors, I either use Manic Panic or RAW, both of which you can get at Hot Topic or online.
So I've got my hair dye, and all my supplies [comb, plastic bags, plastic gloves, vaseline, hair ties, towels, an old t-shirt, a mirror, and sometimes a friend], and I'm ready to start. First thing I do is separate my hair into the top and bottom sections. I always do the top section first. I don't know why. LOL. Making sure I don't let any of the dye touch the bottom part of my hair, I dye the top following package instructions. Once that's done and rinsed, I give my hair a nice blow drying and get ready for round 2. When you're working with RAW or Manic Panic, keep in mind that they stain VERY easily, and you must be careful. Rub Vaseline all around your hairline and your ears, so you don't end up dyeing yourself along with your hair. Make sure your hair is dry. Tie a plastic bag around your neck [but don't choke yourself]. Then, put your gloves on and open the dye. Working in small sections, coat your hair in dye and rub it into your hair thoroughly. Once you've done this, use your comb to make sure it's in easily. Leave it on for however the long the package says, and wash it out WHILE WEARING GLOVES.
Then, style however you like :). Make sure you use color-safe shampoo and conditioner so it will last longer and remain vibrant.
Hope this helps :)
XO,
K
When doing this, I change the color of my whole head. For example, my hair was pink and brown, but I've just changed it to purple and black. For the "natural" colors, I usually use Herbal Essences brand hair dye from drugstores. It lasts long and doesn't damage your hair like other dyes can, plus it doesn't stink. :) For my crazy colors, I either use Manic Panic or RAW, both of which you can get at Hot Topic or online.
So I've got my hair dye, and all my supplies [comb, plastic bags, plastic gloves, vaseline, hair ties, towels, an old t-shirt, a mirror, and sometimes a friend], and I'm ready to start. First thing I do is separate my hair into the top and bottom sections. I always do the top section first. I don't know why. LOL. Making sure I don't let any of the dye touch the bottom part of my hair, I dye the top following package instructions. Once that's done and rinsed, I give my hair a nice blow drying and get ready for round 2. When you're working with RAW or Manic Panic, keep in mind that they stain VERY easily, and you must be careful. Rub Vaseline all around your hairline and your ears, so you don't end up dyeing yourself along with your hair. Make sure your hair is dry. Tie a plastic bag around your neck [but don't choke yourself]. Then, put your gloves on and open the dye. Working in small sections, coat your hair in dye and rub it into your hair thoroughly. Once you've done this, use your comb to make sure it's in easily. Leave it on for however the long the package says, and wash it out WHILE WEARING GLOVES.
Then, style however you like :). Make sure you use color-safe shampoo and conditioner so it will last longer and remain vibrant.
Hope this helps :)
XO,
K
Thursday, February 5, 2009
fml.temple.edu
LOL. I thought it was a witty title. Maybe not.
Anyway - updates!
-My roommate is pledging Alpha Epsilon Phi. It's exciting to me.
-I am missing the following items this semester: curling iron and can opener. I need them.
-My religion class is slowly killing me. It makes me crave the end of the semester.
-I'm craving windblown hair, saltwater, a wetsuit, a bikini, and a tan. I need beach.
-Quitting smoking? Not going well, for the record.
-The Kerry Club has more excellent adventures than you can imagine.
-Tongue piercings are addicting, and apparently contagious. A lot of people seem to be getting them.
-I've stopped taking sugar in my coffee.
-I'm much more organized this semester. I'm going for at least a 3.8.
-The hypothyrodism is now under control. The pills are working well.
-Now that Crown has started taking Diamond Dollars, I believe a heart attack will occur soon.
-I'm living with Christine next year. Towers, here we come.
-I still hate coach buses, but I'm ending up on them quite often these days.
-Purple iPod nano > oxygen.
-I've only been to the TECH once.
That's about it.
Also, I'm on a writing binge.
Sneak peeks soon.
xo, k
Anyway - updates!
-My roommate is pledging Alpha Epsilon Phi. It's exciting to me.
-I am missing the following items this semester: curling iron and can opener. I need them.
-My religion class is slowly killing me. It makes me crave the end of the semester.
-I'm craving windblown hair, saltwater, a wetsuit, a bikini, and a tan. I need beach.
-Quitting smoking? Not going well, for the record.
-The Kerry Club has more excellent adventures than you can imagine.
-Tongue piercings are addicting, and apparently contagious. A lot of people seem to be getting them.
-I've stopped taking sugar in my coffee.
-I'm much more organized this semester. I'm going for at least a 3.8.
-The hypothyrodism is now under control. The pills are working well.
-Now that Crown has started taking Diamond Dollars, I believe a heart attack will occur soon.
-I'm living with Christine next year. Towers, here we come.
-I still hate coach buses, but I'm ending up on them quite often these days.
-Purple iPod nano > oxygen.
-I've only been to the TECH once.
That's about it.
Also, I'm on a writing binge.
Sneak peeks soon.
xo, k
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